GETTING PERSONAL w/Soaps.com

This past summer, Soaps.com posted a short article. I didn’t repost because there were something private in the article that I’ve yet to discuss. I would never want anything misconstrued, twisted or used wrongly. You may not even notice what I’m referring to… might just seem like another recap of an instagram post?

I know from first hand experience, when another individual shares their journey, their vulnerability invites me in and comforts me. Community is meaningful and important. For me, it’s a gift from God, especially when community prays together. Many people on social media have reached out to me sharing their similar experiences. Some have been incredibly traumatic, sensitive and urgent topics. I try to get back to all of you. I’m sorry if I don’t…. If you choose to comment here, I read them and I hope to respond very quickly. I started a facebook group for this purpose (amongst other purposes- to connect on a more private level about our lives in general). I haven’t been active with that… but plan to revisit if there’s interest. If you are going through turmoil and choose not to respond, I hope you take comfort in knowing you are not alone, even in your darkest hour.

I’m still in the middle of my ordeal….it’s ongoing and depleting, which is hard to believe 14 months later.

I usually post some sort of photo with the posts, so here is a random one from the week, no relation to the topic.

SEE ARTICLE BELOW:

soaps.com.JPG

Bold and Beautiful, General Hospital actress has come a long way.

Actress Ashley Jones, who has played Bold and Beautiful’s Bridget Forrester… since 2004, and who also appeared on General Hospital as Parker Forsyth, accepted the recent black and white challenge on social media, a campaign inspired by the soaring rates of violence against women as well as the brutal murder of a 27-year-old student named Pinar Gültekin. She used the opportunity to not only express her solidarity with Turkish women, and women who support other women, but also to reflect candidly on her own personal journey. Her heartfelt post began, “I look back on the past year and get so emotional thinking about certain tough dark times, I can barely see through my tears writing this. But here I am because God gave me the greatest support system that continually reminds me of my strength.”

The strong and talented Jones filed for divorce and a restraining order last fall against husband…amid allegations of abuse, and, happily, appears to be doing so much better. She updated, “I’m still just putting one foot in front of another, but sometimes look back and marvel- I’ve come a long way.” The actress took time in the post to thank God, her family, and added, “And thank you (you know who you are) for showing up in all the ways and ALL THE PLACES and carrying me when I simply couldn’t take another step.”

Ashley spoke to us directly saying, “It was August 17th that I had to leave my home with my son- almost a year ago. It’s interesting to look back the last year. But, Hayden is thriving and we are doing well trying to move forward and rebuild.” We are also happy to hear her report that the domestic violence restraining order became a permanent order on Feb 20, 2020….and currently has custody of their child.

Jones, who rejoined her Bold and Beautiful family for scenes that aired before the production shutdown in March, summed up her post by saying, “There is a treasure in the trauma… look for it. That is where you find your strength.” She also encouraged her followers to flood the Instagram feed with strong women and thanked “the good men out there supporting us women.”

ALL INFO REPOSTED FROM SOAPS.COM.

TRANSFORMATION COMES AT A COST

ashley-jones-workout.JPG

As I was struggling to “go up the hill” in spin class this week at peak resistance, the instructor said something that struck me. TRANSFORMATION COMES AT A HIGH COST. She said that THREE times. And at one point, when I was about to just STOP, it was like she heard my inner voice and said, DO NOT GIVE UP BEFORE THE MIRACLE HAPPENS. You are almost at the top of the mountain. You are almost THERE. Don’t stop now. What is it that you NEED? What is it that you are PROTECTING? What are you SAVING? It’s up there at the top. GO GET IT.

The thing about transforming ourselves is this: something has to go. You leave part of your “old life” behind. There’s no way around this.

Now, none of this is new information. We’ve all read the inspiring memes a thousand times. But timing is everything, as they say. I am going through an uphill battle right now that doesn’t seem to have an end in sight most days. It’s financially and emotionally exhausting. But TRANSFORMATION COMES AT A HIGH COST. I am making some of the biggest changes of my life. As my preacher Rick Warren reminds us often, focus on the PURPOSE, not the problem. If I focus on the problem and the pain and my “old life,” it seems insurmountable. I feel punched in the gut. Small. Defeated and angry. The anxiety and fear that develops is debilitating, paralyzing and draining. If I focus on the purpose, that pain turns to productive power. And I have energy to pursue the new life I believe God has planned.

And as all this was happening in my head with sweat beating down me, I felt this cathartic rush of emotion. Like I was going to cry in spin class. Ha! Just when I couldn’t push the pedal any longer, the resistance weakened and we were going “downhill.” We reached the peak, caught our breath and we were moving forward at a fast pace. 

workout-wednesday.JPG

Not to make this more profound than it is, but IS KINDA IS! Such a metaphor for God pushing us to our full potential in life. TRANSFORMATION COMES AT A HIGH COST. I’m learning more and more about you all every time I post and you comment. Some of you are dealing with infertility, or being a new mother, or paying off debt, dealing with major health issues, losing loved ones, moving, marriage issues…. Whatever your uphill battle is today that’s taking away your power and feels debilitating, focus on the purpose one pedal push at a time. Stay focused on ONE TASK at a time. And know you are not alone. 

Would love to hear your thoughts- as always- in comments below. Tonight I have set aside time to go through comments on the last few posts!

xoxo

AAJ

ps- workout buddies that push you and hold you accountable are the best! Thank you @iamwillaford.



Verses and quotes I love that relate to this topic. Hope they inspire!

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new. 2 Corinthians 5:17 (NKJV)

RALPH WALDO EMERSON:

“Write it on your heart

that every day is the best day in the year.

He is rich who owns the day, and no one owns the day

who allows it to be invaded with fret and anxiety.

Finish every day and be done with it.

You have done what you could.

Some blunders and absurdities, no doubt crept in.

Forget them as soon as you can, tomorrow is a new day;

begin it well and serenely, with too high a spirit

to be cumbered with your old nonsense.

This new day is too dear,

with its hopes and invitations,

to waste a moment on the yesterdays.”

ps- thank you, Mary, for reminding me of this one.