HOW TO COPE IN QUARANTINE: 9 WAYS THAT HELP

NOT EVEN ONE POPPY WAS HARMED IN THE TAKING OF THIS PHOTO. PLEASE SCROLL FOR MORE INFO ON THIS. AND THE DRESS. LANCASTER, CALIFORNIA

NOT EVEN ONE POPPY WAS HARMED IN THE TAKING OF THIS PHOTO. PLEASE SCROLL FOR MORE INFO ON THIS. AND THE DRESS. LANCASTER, CALIFORNIA

HOW TO COPE IN QUARANTINE and BEYOND. Recently, there have been a lot of new visitors to the blog! Welcome. Thank you for being here. Please introduce yourself in comments;)

It seems almost everyone I’ve talked to has had some crummy days. Actually rotten, awful, no-good, very bad days. Even those of us with the HAPPY GENE. Can YOU relate? I don’t need to state the obvious, but will anyway cause I tend to do that.🤷🏼‍♀️  Just because the quarantine is happening doesn’t mean life is stopping. The natural storms of life still roll in at the most inopportune times: health issues, marital problems, infertility, financial stress, domestic abuse, job loss, divorce, etc, then layer on COVID-19 quarantine. And we don’t have the typical support usually afforded us. We feel more alone. I often tell myself- if I could just deal with ONE of the things going on, it would be manageable. This time has forced us ALL to create a new normal.  A new baseline for stress and managing life. I reckon by the time we become so good at this new normal, it’ll be over, then we will have to reconcile the “old” with the “new ways” of our lives. Do we shake hands again meeting new people? How do we handle massively public places like Disneyland and concerts? 

If you’re one of the new ones here and don’t know, everything changed for my son and me last August. I’m currently going through a divorce. It doesn’t ring true to keep so much private, but it’s necessary. 

It’s probably obvious I’m a single mom in quarantine with a three-year-old in an apartment tripping over Paw Patrol toys trying to make ends meet with lawyer bills. But another way for me to write that? I’m so blessed to have a  beautiful, HEALTHY, GOOD boy, while staying sane and afloat by the grace of God in a city with nearly perfect weather and a diehard loving support system that includes YOU. #Perspective. 

To those going through any major life changes during this time, please be gentle on yourself. I remind myself that every. single. day. This too shall pass. We will look back in amazement, knowing God carried us through the worst and we’re more than SURVIVORS. We will thrive.💪🏼💪🏼

Now, back to those over-whelming days where life nearly strangles you metaphorically and you feel like the house fell on you as the tornado drifted away.

I made a list today curated from trial and error, sermons, books, teachers.  I’ll reference on days where circumstances seem heavy, now or anytime in the future, ‘cause anxiety will not go away with the quarantine, sadly.

9 STEPS TO TRY FOR ANXIETY

  1. Pray and breathe. Be specific. So grateful for the life I have and I’m requesting for myself (and those going through similar things) energy, stamina and wisdom today to get me through x, y and z, and to approach everyone with an open loving heart. 

  2. Jot down thoughts as they come. Identify the mental road blocks and literally write them down. Work through them one by one.

  3. Phone a confidant. Or zoom or FaceTime with a group.

  4. I can’t see clearly what my blocks are if my world is cluttered. I need a clean environment. I know people that need to go for a run to clear their minds. Or COOK or BAKE (love seeing all the recipes!), or simply change up the scenery (hence our “road trip” 80minutes away to the California poppies pictured in this post). You know yourself well enough to know what can help, now you must do it.

  5. Look at your situation from a third perspective. I picture myself as a friend coming in to help. What would I tell a friend/sister? How would I help her?

  6. Help someone else. However big or small, it shifts gears in a good way.

  7. Write down something to look forward to…. a hot bath, a good meal, book, even SLEEP

  8. MUSIC. When I’m in a place of high anxiety, I need silence. But, once I get through the first hurdle, music can help me tremendously. Should I share my favorite playlists?

  9. Visualize the other side… when your goals are met and you are over the hurdle? Tell yourself (or a friend) the story of how you OVERCAME the insurmountable and what it took to do it. This is a powerful exercise. HOW DOES IT FEEL?

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Life can easily seem insurmountable, like a living nightmare. If you’re going through it today, be as gentle as you would be to your best friend. It’s okay to be exactly where you are. Even if that means shutting down and doing nothing! In fact, sometimes it’s necessary. How do you cope with anxiety? I’d love to know your steps. Please share with us.

XOXO

ASHLEY JONES

If you are experiencing thoughts of despair, please contact Suicide Prevention Hotline 800-273-8255, and if you are experiencing domestic abuse, please call 1-800-799-SAFE.

Right near the road, easy access to stand, or hunker down without hurting the poppies! ALL SOCIAL DISTANCING PROTOCOLS WERE OBSERVED.

Right near the road, easy access to stand, or hunker down without hurting the poppies! ALL SOCIAL DISTANCING PROTOCOLS WERE OBSERVED.

This dress has been a favorite for years now. The slip in photo above got bunched up when I stood, but it is longer than pictured;) Buying pieces that last is part of the philosophy of sustainable fashion. I have worn this over and over (own a few colors that are on sale, too, see below). I’m in a size small for buying reference. Click photo below for more details and available colors ($89).

A DIFFERENT DIRECTION

It’s a dreary, cold day here in LA. I don’t feel like doing much. I’m a bit down mentally and physically. I’m congested and worn out. Probably the exact time I should force myself to go workout. We’ll see. I’m also in the midst of potty training. Lord, help me! lol.

Last Friday I mentioned on inststory I had an audition. Yesterday, I found out it was down to the wire. I was what we call “pinned” in the auditioning world. I’m not sure if I should say what show, but I don’t really see why not? For the sake of the show, I will wait and say what series later…It was for a recurring role on popular primetime show.  The character was very interesting and complicated. Truth be told, there aren’t that many roles right now for Caucasians my age. I should feel good that I got so close to getting it. But, alas, last night, I learned it went to the other woman. There’s lots of fun ways they tell you the role is not yours.
They “went another direction,” or “it didn’t go your way this time.”  Makes me want to make a change… what can I do to shake things up? Go back to my natural dark hair? Yep, this photo below is my natural color. (By now, a little grey has seeped in, though). Silly thing to change my hair, but maybe not? Maybe I should go in a different direction!

Side note for those of you that might ask, I would be so happy going back to your favorite daytime shows or working on Hallmark or continuing with Lifetime (next movie airs in May). So, thanks for your support in those endeavors.

darkerhairphoto/ashleyajones.com

The business side of our industry is depleting at times. I don’t like to call it rejection. There are so many puzzle pieces to making a project work, sometimes it really is not about me. So, I have to let go. I usually allow myself 20 minutes or so of being bummed, then I must move on and forget about it. I come home to my family, my reality… where we have plenty of other things to worry about.

I know we all go through things like this in life where we are so close to the “next step,” or getting a new campaign or case or position at the company. And then it doesn’t happen. But we have to understand there’s a bigger picture. Sometimes it’s just so hard to see or even want to see. It just feels like failure. I wanna get mad at…. I don’t even know who really. 

Some of you have left comments here about current situations. Health issues, or job changes….or both. I truly cannot begin to imagine how frustrating, depleting and devastating some of those circumstances are. I am so encouraged by your strength and it puts things into perspective for me. Also, I appreciate this blog and communicating with y’all. Thanks for sharing with me, too.

One book in the bible that I like to read (and should read more) is Isaiah. If you are interested, here are two of my favorites that help me change my perspective and give my thoughts to God. Also, unanswered prayers are often protection. 

Isaiah 41: 10 Have no fear, for I am with you; do not be looking about in trouble, for I am your God; I will give you strength, yes, I will be your helper; yes, my true right hand will be your support.

Isaiah 40:28 Do you not know? Have you not heard? The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom. 

Have a great day, y’all. Feel free to share in the comments!!

 
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